Go Go Go Joseph!

So the past few weeks of Parashot have involved the Joseph story (Joseph was taken to Egypt in chains and sold/Joseph was taken to Egypt in chains and sold), and I've had a hard time listening to Torah study because I keep getting songs from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat stuck in my head.

I mentioned this to one of our rabbis, who kind of curled her lip in polite disdain. I don't think she's an Andrew Lloyd Webber fan.

I didn't intend to be either, but Cats came out when I was a 1o-year-old with a subscription to Cat Fancy magazine, and Phantom of the Opera came out when I was a pudgy, overly-romantic 14-year-old, so I hope I can be forgiven the nostalgia value.

Cherubim

As I prepare to return to work after a rather blissful week off, a gleaning from the Plaut commentary on B'reishit:

The Cherubim

According to tradition, they were angels of destruction, while those hovering over the ark (Exod. 24:22) were guardian angels. All had the faces of children. From this we may learn that if children are trained properly they resemble the cherubim of the ark; if not, those of Eden. -- Moshe Mordecai Epstein

This seems about right.

Reframing

I had a long talk with one of our rabbis the other day, the upshot of which is that she's going to help reconnect me with the rabbi with whom I'm really supposed to be working, so that's all good.

In the course of our rambling (due entirely to me) conversation, I mentioned how I often feel like I really have no right to claim Judaism because the Jewish story is not my story. Her take on it is that, other than blood family, nobody starts out in a community; we develop our own communities and enter others through conversation and shared experience. She likened converting to Judaism to becoming part of another person's family through marriage; one's spouse's family's stories become part of one's own story over time. That clarified a lot for me right there.

She also asked how it would be if I converted and continued to have doubts. I told her it would be pretty much like the rest of my life and I could live with that.

Afterwards, I was thinking about that some more, and I realized that I don't particularly trust anyone who has never had a doubt or a question about their religion. That way lies fanaticism, bigotry and worse.

This goes, of course, for many, if not all, aspects of life other than religion, which can be a frustrating way to live at times. One of our other rabbis once spoke about living in the doubt and how energizing he finds that. Sometimes I believe him, but sometimes, I just want to be sure. So I pick a few small things to be sure about (e.g. I like cats; I don't like coconut) so I can handle living in the doubt about the big things.

Another Plaut quote

"Mutations in the realm of the spiritual seem to have occurred frequently in human experience, and the biblical record should be read in part as the record of such mutations."

Jews...are mutants? Hm.

So much to post about...

...so little time. I want to write about the High Holy Days and more, but for now, I'd like to mention that I've determined to at least read the weekly parasha. I do go to Torah study just about every week, but I haven't really read the whole thing myself on any regular basis. Our congregation reads the Torah on a yearly cycle, so having just finished Simchat Torah, it seemed like a logical time to start. I intend to read the entire Tanakh, but I'm not sure that's going to be this year.

The new Plaut commentary works well for me because it places the Haftarah portion immediately after the Torah portion. It also is bound to be read right to left, which I like, only the copies we use in Torah study are the older edition, which are intended to be read left to right, so now that I'm doing some studying at home, I keep turning to the back of the old edition to find Genesis, which isn't working so well.

Anyway, I'm already two weeks behind because I insist upon reading the introductory material, so I haven't actually gotten to the Torah part of the Torah commentary yet. So here are a couple of quotes I liked:

"History neither confirms or denies religious commitment. Acknowledging that Martin Luther was a historical figure does not make us Lutherans; denying the historicity of Moses does not preclude our fervor as Jews." Plaut, "The Torah and the Jewish People", The Torah: A Modern Commentary, p. li.

"Though the Torah contains chapters that are, at most, of historical interest only, it also contains much that is relevant and vital today. If it sometimes expresses moral judgments we have discarded as unsatisfactory, it also challenges us with ideals we are far from having attained. Moreover, for us as for our ancestors, the line between written and oral Torah cannot be drawn over-sharply. We too read the text in the light of the experiences and associations that have become attached to it. Every great classic suggests or reveals new insights to each succeeding generation. And the Torah is the classic of classics." ibid.

(Although I can't read the last line without getting "Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles..." stuck in my head.)

Selichot

The other night, our synagogue held a beautiful Selichot service, after a discussion of Mussar.

One of our rabbis mentioned that the Selichot service there used to begin at midnight, because Jewish tradition (according to this rabbi) held that midnight, along with dawn and dusk, was one of the three liminal times of day, the times at which change is most possible.

That thought reminded me of a friend from times past who believed that in the light of dusk, you could come close to seeing a person's true self with the physical eye.

I hope I'm missing something

Our rabbis are making very sure we all know that the High Holy Days are just about here. I'm looking forward to the Selichot service this Saturday evening.

I was exploring some other Judaism-focused personal blogs last week, and I found one in which a couple of years ago, the author posted something like "This is to ask forgiveness of anyone I may have wronged, purposely or accidentally, in the past year".

I am assuming that this post was in addition to, not instead of, the face-to-face requests for forgiveness from those we've wronged. In a way, I like it, because I'm always afraid I've wronged people without realizing it...in fact, I'm sure I have, as we all do...and I can't seek reconciliation without knowing with whom I'm supposed to reconcile. But something about the blanket nature of such a post seems to go against the soul-searching that I think the Days of Awe are supposed to involve.

Was there a pre-Internet equivalent of a blog post like that?